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so yeah.. i'm just really bored right now, just sitting at my sisters appt and for some odd reason, i was looking at wedding dresses. yeah don't ask why, but i think it's just a girl thing.. who knows.
in a way, i just want to settle down right now and get married. then at the same time i don't want to get married because i've had so many problems with guys in the past that i don't want to deal with them at all. but then again, this might just be a girl thing as well..
why do people do what they do? why do we always want more then what we have? and why can't we just be happy with what we have? sorry, just rambling about nothing.. but yeah, i'll go again.

xoxo

Current Mood:
contemplative contemplative
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i know i pretty much said the same thing in the last journal.. but i don't think that anyone even uses this anymore.. but if someone knows, then let me know! yeah, so about two months ago, my life was totally turned upside down. i was with someone that made me completely happy, and everything was going fine, and then the next day, he told me that he didn't want to be with me anymore. it broke my heart.. and i'm still waiting for him.. but thats anyother story for another time..
so yeah, i miss everyone so much! i'm still stuck in fremont and everyone else has moved on to bigger and better things.. like college. but at least i don't have to pay for anything! ha, i live for free still.. unlike all of you how chose to leave.. eat that! anyways..
so i really don't know what to talk about anymore, but i'm really bored. just sittin here at my sisters apartment, eating her food, watching her tv, and using her wireless internet (yet notice, it's still living for free!). basically i have no life.
oh yeah! so i finished my schooling for Cosmetology! actually, my last day was monday. i get the call tomorrow telling me when i have to go take the 'test' for my license... and guess what, it was free schooling! hell yeah!
so yeah, now i really think that i'm going to get going.. i feel like an idiot for still using this. haha but if anyone is still on here, let me know!
Current Mood:
content content
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holy cow... so i don't even know if anyone uses this anymore but i'm sitting in my college class and just thought i would get on here.. this is insane! well.. if anyone actually still reads these just comment! i love you all!

xoxo

Current Mood:
tired tired
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well i haven't updated in a while, so here it goes..
powderpuff football yesterday. lost one, won one & really sore
bunch of germans at school now including the one i have at home
hung with karly saturday night
still sick

and i'm still madly in love with randy. i can't believe it's been this long and we still haven't gotten into a really big fight (that we created). i love him so much and i don't know what i would do without him. school's going alright.. pretty good grades, alright classes and voc. is going pretty smooth. i don't really get to see randy all that much. about once a week if that. we try to talk as much as possible, but when i'm in class or working, he isn't and when i'm out of class and not working, he's in class or working. so it's not real cool. but we're still together!

well i don't know what else to say.. still haven't gotten my senior pics back yet.. and don't know when they'll be in.. so yeah. nobody plan on getting one any time soon. sooo... i don't know what else to talk about.. so i'm off!!
Current Mood:
cold cold
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yeah.. so i saw someone else's schedule on here and decided to be cool right along with them.. and plus, that way if any of you have a class with me.. let me know, alright?

1st trimester
1-gov't bull
2-personal finance finch
3-spanish 4a herlein
4-cosmo
5-cosmo

2nd trimester
1-spanish 4b (independant study) herlein
2-human biology (mon and wed w/ cmu)
3-painting smith
4-cosmo
5-cosmo

3rd trimester
1-total body fitness gardenour
2-clothing and fashion parkhurst
3-free hour
4-cosmo
5-cosmo
after school from 4:30-6:45- psychology (tues w/ cmu)

i have the free hour because i'm taking a night class.. so i'm happy about that. well.. thats about it folks!

Current Mood:
chipper chipper
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HEY EVERYONE!!
i am back and ready for action!
mexico was awesome and going on that mission trip was possibly one of the best things that i've ever done. when i get my pictures back i'll try to get them on here so you all can see the cute kids! they were so awesome! it was crazy how welcoming all of the people were to us. there were over 850 people on the trip, we got a and we built 26 houses in 4 days. i would call that absolutely amazing. well.. thats all i have to say for now, except that i miss you all and i definatly missed my mom the most! lol
Current Mood:
drained drained
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gosh.. still looking for a job. i've called the places that i've applied and they aren't hiring and such. so i don't really know what to do yet.

WELL.. me and randy are doing just splendid! the typical, stupid fremont fuckers had to start shit and told randy that i was hanging all over guys when all i did was shake hands with 3 guys. now, if thats being all over guys.. then i don't know where i've been all this time. one person i'd like to credit for this lovely series of events is kev mollet. don't care about the spelling because you all know him. and then when i went to confront him about it, he ignored me LITERALLY like i wasn't standing there trying to say something to him. the stupid fucker. yeah, i use to 'get along' with him until he started that.

anyways! like i said, we are doing splendid.. when i went to the craft fair, i bought some oils from this whole scent tent thing. omg! my nose hurt after i got done from there! and the best thing is, is that they make all the perfumes and colognes that they provide.. and it doesn't have all the alcohol in it so when you smell it, it doesn't give you a head-ache! they smell so good to! i got randy the Very Sexy (Victoria's Secret) and then i got Paris Hilton. yes, i do hate her with a passion, but the perfume smells good. the guy at the stand and i renamed it rich bitch perfume lol. he was cool. so back to my origional story, me and randy had a few words because of all the rumors. well, today he called me and told me that he had gotten me something because he felt bad for all the yelling he had done at me when none of it was even true. he got me this shirt from pac sun. it's a hurley shirt and it's really cute! at first when he told me that he had gotten me a shirt i thought "great.. (sigh)" because i did't know if he knew what i liked. but it was perfect! he just keeps suprising me! lol

so i'm kinda mad that the festival is over with because i got to see a lot of my friends there and now i'll have to wait to see them again at school. i need to get out more lol.

oh i almost forgot! if anyone would like to get some of the oils.. they're raelly cheap and last a long time. just comment back to this or email me and i'll get you the number for the people. they're going to be at the coast guard festival too.. so you can pick some up there. and believe me, they're TOTALLY worth every penny!
Current Mood:
crazy crazy
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I LOVE RANDY PEKEL SOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!
Current Mood:
loved loved
Current Music:
none
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well.. 9 days until i leave.. i'm kinda scared.
i've never flown alone before. and air ports make me nervous.
it's not that i don't like flyin, because i love it. but all the different hallyways look the same to me and i can't tell the difference between them or where i have to go.
i know i'll be fine because i can just ask for help if i need it, but i'm still a little nervous about it.

well, brandon delong comes home from korea in 5 days. it's exciting. i've known this kid since i was in 3rd grade.
funny story.. him and chad were pushing me back and forth (in 3rd grade) between each other.. chad was behind me and instead of pushing my back, he was 'push/punching' it. i started to cry and brooke went and got their mom. she chased them downstairs to their rooms with a spatula! she was like hitting them with it and it was so funny.. i guess you just had to be there lol.
i saw brandon like a couple days before he left and we just hung out at the sheppards house, ate and watched tv and such things.
all i know is that we definately have to play the game of life! lol i love that game!

i really miss tyler sheppard. i haven't seen or talked to him in about a month because we're both really busy with sports, him working and other friends. so i think i'm going to make a point to hang out with him sometime soon when he gets back from soccer camp.

gosh.. the last three days i was at cheerleading camp in shelby and now today i have to go and lay sod for the soccer team. and you know what, i don't care what you guys think about cheerleading, i'm fucking sore! we did so much crap that i can barely move my upper body..my legs aren't that bad.
one thing that i don't get about you people is why you always think that in cheerleading all you do is yell and clap. that is defiantely a bunch of bull shit! i'm sure that most of you people couldn't throw people into the air on any day that you feel the need. we seriously work so hard at what we do and all our school does is cut us down. we're not the steriotypical cheerleaders. that was the 50's. you people need to get a reality check. we work our asses of to win competitions and every year we're getting better. i don't see why some of you girls wont just come to one or two practices and see how you like it. if you don't then you can leave, but just be open minded.
thats the problem with fremont. all we support is fucking football, basketball and girls volleyball. if the rest of the school programs had half of the funding and support as those three sports had, we could be twice as good. but fremont wont.. and its a bunch of shit.

alright.. thats my bitching for this week!
Current Mood:
cranky cranky
Current Music:
Easy Target--Blink 182
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80's day today.. we had a blast! woo hoo!

i talked to sean bergsma for the first time in forever. for all who don't know him, which i think is everyone except me and sarah schornagel.. he's from grand haven. no big deal..

it's really weird. my stomach hurts really bad. it's not an ache.. i have like pains.. almost like cramps, but 10 times worse and up higher.. in my stomach. when i got home from sarah's house, i couldn't even stand up straight. then i felt like i was going to vomit. but now they're going away a little bit. so i should be alright.

we got an air conditioner today. it's one of those that you stick in the window.. not central air or anything, but it works for me! now all i need is cable and maybe some tevo, and i'll be set for life!

i heard this song on the radio for the first time in YEARS! and i love it so i thought that i would share the lyrics with all you crazy-cool people..

I read a note my grandma wrote back in 1923
Grandpa kept it in his coat and he showed it once to me
He said boy you might not understand
But a long, long time ago
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none
But I love your grandma so

We had this crazy plan to meet
And run away together
Get married in the first town we came to and live forever
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet instead
I found this letter
And this is what it said

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then til I see you again
I'll be loving you, love me

I read those words just hours before my grandma past away
In the door way of a church
Where me and grandpa stopped to pray
I know I'd never seen him cry in all my 15 years
But as he said these words to her
His eyes filled up with tears

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then til I see you again
I'll be loving you, love me
Between now and then ‘til I see you again
I'll be loving you, love me


It's called "If You Get There Before I Do" by Collin Raye. it's also called "Love, Me".. and it's country, so i know most if not almost all of you wont like it, but i do.. so i don't care!
Current Mood:
sick sick
Current Music:
the crazy tunes inside my head...
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